See You Soonest!

Now that summer is almost over.
What have I really done in my vacation?

Apparently, I've met a lot of people this time of the year.
But of course, it's a lot different now.
Especially that since we transferred house, I won't be able to see my 'kababata' and elementary friends and classmates that frequently.
I also miss my 'ninongs' and 'ninangs' who have been very kind to me in my childhood years.
Things have changed a lot.

This summer, I was able to meet a lot of high school classmates, friends in Bukidnon (my childhood bestfriend), cousins of course,and new faces in random places.
I've gone to Dahilayan, Manila, Iligan and most of the time, CDO since my high school friends are there.
It's gonna be quite difficult if you have to travel places just to meet your treasured friends. But it's okay. It would have been a lot better if their houses are a walk away from our house.

Anyway, I still have this hangover from an overnight in Kath's house. Games. LOVE talk, which they love the most. SHOTS. And i am the victim in this instance, specifically.

By the way, now that summer is almost over. And I'm just getting much of the rest that I could possibly grip for the last days of summer stay in our house. I still yearn for this Bukidnon smell that seems to be too unique. Fresh air is something that's elusive in nature in Iligan. Second, I will definitely miss the silence. Here, you can create noise as much as possible, but people refrain from espousing the noise and its extensions to its neighborhood.It's because silence also fuels the beauty of this place.

But it's not gonna be automatic step off. Actually, I still have a lot of things in mind which I thought would more likely happen in the future but something that I haven't pre-emptedly prepared yet.Like where exactly will I go when I arrive in Iligan? Either ways, let the fate bring me to where I belong. hahaha.

This June 5, I'll be going to Manila again for the visa interview. Question in mind: Is it going to be difficult? Maybe, I just have to do my best so that no regrets will ever cross my line. And second, I am hoping that DOST will be kind to me this time. But actually, they've always been in the past under Maam Ogena. I don't know if it's gonna be the same.

So hours from now,I will find myself in the travails of Iligan. Let things pave my direction. But one thing to remember : Always be good to yourself!


Dancing Hearts

Actually, you're my favorite thought.
You're my inspiration.
You're my only one, the one I truly love.


The Ride

This is life, it can never be absolutely happy.It can never be perfectly made.It will always have its twists and turns, ups and downs as well. It will make us strong and have faith. Sometimes it makes us cry and suffer, but it will make us stand and learn that no matter how difficult it is, there will always be many reasons to live and smile.

Sometimes, we wanted time to be as fast as a train. So much so as we wanted to leave the facets of the past. But then we loosen our grip, and wished we could have done so much before to make our now a myriad of comfort and content. Just as how we say that time can betray us, yes this is life.Take as much opportunities you could, and drench yourself with the brunt of all your actions.Take the ride with all your heart and soul, and you will live a life with no regrets.

--Shinagawa,Tokyo,Japan. 04.17.10


What Am I Thinking Today?

Yes, I contemplate.
People contemplate because they feel that this is the best thing that they can do.
It's a validation of self-friendship and projecting what is best for yourself.
A lot of people come in the cycle of life.
You think of one aspect of life, the other one thinks of another in the opposite side of the world.
When they come across, it ends up as a matter of fitting in.
Like a puzzle to complete with a plethora of differences.
Sometimes, we come up with the question, who can be the best people we could possibly have?
Is it a matter of how grounded you were with commonalities?
Or is it more of learning from differences, and complementing each other through times?
We never know. It's a life indeed we're trying to learn.
That is essentially the reason why rejection exists.
That is why break-ups can happen.
That is why ashes turn to dust and lovers to friends.
And the worst when lovers don't end up becoming just friends.
But this is not just about love, seriously.
It's also a matter of how we deal with life.
When we care in a certain group of people,, you'd say you can never please everyone.
Because, it's a matter of relativity.
It's about what you bring to them and what they could perceive from what you brought into them.
Life and engagement.
Indeed, life doesn't have sense when you solitarily prop yourself in isolation.
It's a matter of social construct.
On a lot of cases, the greatest measure of happiness is bounded by social conditions.
Like your family, friends, or lover.
These things end up giving lessons to the lucky ones.
Some people end up as trashes in the reality cycle and become leeches for life lessons other people could have possibly bear a learning from.
Either ways, if it's what destiny brings you or if it's just a matter of repercussions to your pure discretion, you still have to accept it.


Friends Create Good Memories

High school friends.
Every time I go to CDO. I always get to remember high school memories. All the crazy things we've done, expressions like 'agshids', 'jologs' steps for Love Moves, code-naming for crushes,teacher hating, petty misunderstanding, etc. That is so high school. Minor things get big issues.That's how we deal with the cruciality of our transition towards adulthood and maturity.

This week is really a week to ponder of unforgettable experiences I've shared with those special people I've met. From Monday to Wednesday, I've been with Roberto, Jesus, Jolo, Dixie, Loreto, and other high school friends. We talked a lot. And I just can't get over what Berto recalled. BALANGKAS. It's precisely because I am in the limelight in this issue. Imagine, I submitted a notebook that contains appreciations(*and a bit of criticisms) to my classmates to our History teacher. It is because she requires us to write a summary of lessons in our notebook. And because I'm quite fed up with the lessons that time and due to immeasurable boredom, instead of a lesson summary, I made a classmate profiling. It's like that one in Mean Girls but on the positive light. When she found out of this, I've been so screwed especially that I have influenced my high school close friend Hippo to do the same. And also because I'm the top in our batch, I'm supposed to be the one whose gonna imbue the values for the rest to follow. Oh, that's one unprecedented attention from teachers with repercussion of reprimands that I will never forget.

Moving on, other than those meals I've shared with these close friends of mine (Berto treat in the Red Bee, Jesus in Chowking and Jolo in TF). I also spent good times with friends in Iligan. Like Sir Rodel treated us in Coffeeworks(oh, thanks for the umbrella) with Crezl. Then Jay-r got me for a dinner in Mang Inasal. And the lunch with Ate Kay in Chowking the next day. Then the MIDV shots at Kyla's Bistro with Mark, Karl, Mam Pyet, Sir Darwin. And also the visit to Maam Mara with Calvin and LT.Many acquaintances coupled the trip that's supposed to be stressful in paperworks. I had a great time in Iligan.

GAMARKA is always a good company for me. Karen and Maricar are like adorable angels who can tell me everything they wanna say (*of course, they just told me I'm kind and sweet). Even though Karen and I are closer to one another, we always try to make every opportunity of meeting-up worth reckoning without getting one left hanging or out of place. I just like the way how the friendship lasted even after the Capitol and Night Cafe days.

By the way, we met up the other day. But this time, with Yantzky, Katy, and Beny.And the night is full of laughters. All the way from Mang Inasal, the curly hair in the juice, the running rice (*Karen's grin), Ceasy's group yourselves into 5 (shet,i just find this so funny. I could hardly stop laughing), Arianne's pouting lips for Katy, the rice cup competition (won by Beny), and the keeping of change. (*again , courtesy of Beny).

Then we went to Missy Bon Bon. Ceas gave us a treat again with the Gelatos. Just that, they ended up dipping on the Mixed Berry Yogurt I ordered because they feel like it's way better than theirs. Then we talked and talked and talked until 11. And walked in the highway, not even thinking I still have to go home in Bukidnon. That's the reason why I arrived home so late. 12:15 I think. Then my Ma asked me why do I have to fill in the quota of the night. I just said, " It's always factored in!".

Health Lifestyle

I really like sleeping. It's because it's something that I've been craving for every time academic semesters come in. I rarely get sleep while in school. That is why I'm trying to make out of it this summer. But still, since I've got a lot of things to do in summer, there isn't much of a glaring difference. Other than the fact that I have the liberty of the schedule on the time of sleeping.

Well, before this gets even more non-sense. I think there are a lot of benefits one could get in sleeping. Actually, if you have good sleep, you open the doors to a healthy lifestyle. Adequate sleep is really necessary for a good health. That is why people who work long hours at night easily get weak, maybe a number of call center agents give a good example. And also the same reason why a person can die faster without sleeping than without drinking or eating. It's because it's essential in the maintenance of body metabolism. Coupled with a good exercise and healthy food, sure you'll get the fitness you're aspiring for. No, I'm not speaking for myself, but for others.

Of course, fruits are very ideal in maintaining good body shapes. I like the Italian Gourmet Gelato. They say, when you eat one apple everyday, for sure you're a mile away from the doctor.
There's a wide array of natural vitamins that gives out random benefits when you supplement your eating habits with these nature reaps.

I used to plan dietary mechanisms before for a healthy lifestyle,just got ruined by random invites to fast food chains I used to even like by discretionary means.

There's a need to change the habit. I still believe that health and beauty is a wise investment.


Laments and Relative Perspectives towards Tolerance

There are a lot of things happening in life.
Almost all aspects of life, eto nah.
Welcome to life, the spice, the halo, and the shit out it.
Happiness comes in. My family, friends and close friends surely supplement that.
Pero let's try to look at the negative side.
the Binary Opposites.
Wala naman sigurong purely bad at heart.
Siguro, in terms of perspectives, it's so so so relative.
Differences come along the way.
Like thinking na cguro we're friends naman,
so it's no way of offense to the other party.
Even if you jerk at him, it's okay.
Kasi nga, para sa'yo, friendship can cross borders.
Sige, there's a relative standard din.
Like which people yung more likely pipiliin mong
magsubject ng greater tolerance sa mga bagay na yan.
Maybe, or more likely, sa mga close friends.
Pero may fail.
Kasi hindi lahat ng instances, tama ang isang tao sa pag-identify
kung sino yung mga tao na mapagkakatiwalaan niya at hindi.
That is what history is all about.
Learning from the past so that the mistake won't happen again.
Now, following that logic,
how will a certain person really deal with history and its travails?
Andiyan ang dichotomy.
Because in terms of a person's likelihood to learn from it and not do it again,
sobrang lawak ng difference.
Variety of people in a world where sanity and insanity can coexist.
Pero beyond that, what really makes a person a human? pure at heart?
Like I'm talking of the morally acceptable standards we used to have now.
Bakit kaya may mga standards in the first place?
And what if we take it out from the scenario?
KASI naman, kung walang standards, ang gulo na nang mundo.
Hindi mo alam kung sino ang mabait at sino ung masama.
Kasi wala ngang standard 'di ba?
so there's a dire need.
Pero if you wanna talk about the evolution of those standards.
necessary din.
kasi reflective ung standards based on public acceptability.
Pero why is it na relative yung standard, person by person.
Even if pinanganak tayong mayroon nang kinikilalang acceptable values,
ang perception ng mga values na yun ay hindi pareho.
Kaya nga may kanya-kanya tayong utak.
Kasi that's the value of differences.
Kaya nga may bobo at may matalino.
Kasi, iba-iba yung pag-intindi natin sa mga bagay.
Paano naman pag matalino lahat yung mga kasama mo.
Yung baga alam nila kung ano ang mali at ano ang hindi.
Mayron pa ring difference.
Experience mold your perception of things.
For example, kung may history ka of rejection.
More likely, ang perception mo of friendship has more standards.
Kasi yung pagkukulang ng iba, gusto mong punan ng iba.
Transfer of burden
Pero hindi xa explicit.
KASI obviously, merong denial strategies.
Being insecure, yun ang standards ng intrusion to privacy.
In relationships naman,
merong natural na consequential progression of things.
May mga times na nag-eexpect ka, and you end up rotting.
*Like texting a cheesy message and you get no reply (hindi ako 'yun!!!)
Meron namang times na unexpectedly, dumarating ang mga surprises.
(Yun ang masaya, pwede ako dun)
Pero yun nga. The more you expect, the more you bleed when stains exist.
Ayoko nang mag-sound melancholic,
basta.kung para kami sa isa't-isa, then be it.
Ayoko ng quasi-intimacy, yung may lies just to feed on maintaining the bond.(***past)
Now, everything's fine.
I just hope na genuine na yung mga things ngayon.
This is life kasi.
People we encounter define what we could be and what we are to other people.
How much do you really sacrifice for love?
And what brand of commitment is needed to make it strong.
As of now, I really don't wanna lose her.
I'm afraid na baka dumating yung panahon na she'll loosen her grip on me
Kasi na-susuffocate na xa on our engagement.
That's why I'm giving her so much freedom.
Freedom to do things in her life.
If she still abides, fine.
ALAM naman kasi niya ang strengths and weaknesses ng relationship namin.
Ultimate weakness yung selos.
Ba't kasi jealousy existed?
Pero one thing, if there's a reason, bakit naman hindi diba?
So before this get's even more random.
Cge , let's just stand on it na lang.
MAHIRAP ang sitwasyon ng isang --- ****y.
And ayoko namang maging ganun ulit.
So I gotta do everything to make her stay.
Kasi kami na naman ngayon.
Sana maintindihan niya ako.
Kasi mahal na mahal ko siya.

I feel like I wanna vomit.
Nasusuka sa Tagalog.hahaha.
So mag-bisaya na lang ko.
Enrollment will come soon.
First off my concern.
DOST clearance and kanang maka-enroll ko ug subjects na sayun.
para OKEY ra ang tanan.
By the way,coping up and resiliency.
good character juud ni xa bah.
being resilient means positive imung paglantaw sa challenges sa kinabuhi.
aha na gud ang bisaya?
by the way, in-ana gyud.
kung wala nakai mabuhat, mao nana.,
you'll end up believing nah mao na lang jud na imung mabuhat, ang mag-adjust.
after all, wala poi mahitabo nimo ug mag-grieve ka for the whole life.
pero of course,
according to ehow.com, kung saan naa koie loyalty award,
give your self a time to grieve
tama pod nah
lisud pod
kai if you follow the logic, ang grief man gud
mahitabo ra na xa para sa mga butang nga atuang gitagaan ug importance
kung dili xa importante
why would we grieve for it? unless something's wrong with you.
so naa jd nai period of adjustment.
grieve for let's say a week.
but after that, live your life again.
after all, your life is a direct effect of your choice.
tanan conditions nimo are manifestations of your choices.
so kung mupili ka nga ma-fool,
bad chooser diay ka? naa diay word na chooser?
hahaha.wala man gud nag highlight
cge, let's make it sound better
now, in this point in time
may new phrase ako
"press the button"
sana ang life ganyan kadali, technically for others
pero not for me
kasi gusto ko
lahat ng achievements
and that's exactly what the past has taught me
There's just a random thought that came into my mind.
Like it's more of the difference between saying something and doing it for real.
that's weird, scratch the thought.
anyway, i woke up in the morning with some kind of fear
pero now
i've been asking myself, bakit nga din naman dIBA?
ung mga matatakot, dapat yung gumawa ng mali
siguro dahil hindi ako used to the fact na i'm speaking up against them now
pero i think this is just how a Prime Minister should function
blatant attacks.
I just remembered.20 na pala ako.
When I used to ask myself kung unsa jud akung nabuhat sa 20 years.
I don't know.
Daghan naman siguro.
Pero contributory kaha tong tanan para sa akuang greater good?
Or at least, naka-catalyze ba xa para ma-enable akung goals in life?
Sabi ni LT, daghan na daw ko'g na-achieve, left unnoticed lang nako.
Sabi ni Rod, sabay lang daw ko sa alon ng academics.
Sabi ni Jeff, disturbed daw ko sa academics.
Sabi ni Eva, bahala pa daw ug maskin unsa akung buhaton ug dili ko magstudy, mupasar jud daw gihapon ko.
Unsa gyud diay kaha ang akuang priorities in life?
Una, family. then friends. then myself.
Ang pag narrow down niya, sakto ra man guro.
Aie wait, kailangan ba unahon ang friends kaysa sa self?
Kasi acad is part of the self , right?
aie tama. Una ang self ,before the friends.
Pero walay any sort of rejection ana ah.
In-ana lang jud nah.
In-ana man gud ang human development model.
Oh, I remember this sa Philosophy book na gihatag ni Jerven Chua.
Anyway, I'll see my friends tomorrow in CDO.
Why is life expensive?hahaha.
in-ana na pod jud na.
aie dili man.it's highly mitigable, also discretionary.
lageh bah.
so non-issue xa.
*like i wrote here "cge, ipost ko na ni kay basahon sa akuang tita".
and she really did.hahaha
by the way, gotta continue.
she told me na i'm thinking too much.
oo nga.lageh ba.i'm thinking too much.
things na dapat left in the air.
i will live a happy life.
HAIE.(in a Japanese tone, it means "yes")
I'm still so young to think for it.
Pero it's good na I have this realizations na lang pod kay blog is really a good keepsake for thoughts.
And like this blog has recorded my life ever since 3rd year.
so gnyan kami kabestfriend nito.
i gotta sign-off now
will take my lunch, eh alas-singko na.
pero ok lang.at least, i've got the blog listening to me.

to the readers:

God Bless!
Ki o tsukete!



You complete me =)

from a person who loves you extremely.
from a person who is willing to give up for your happiness.
from a person who will do everything to make you happy.
from a person who calls you his "first love".
from a person who cares for you so much.
from a person who thinks about you all the time.
from a person who will sacrifice if it means your greater good.
from a person who will tell you everything in his life.
from a person who will take it all,




Debate Digest


Every vacation, there's a reason to visit Manila. If it's not for debate, it's about attending a conference or programme. Yet for now, obviously, it's going to sound more debate-ish as the perspective draw for my experience in LSIV. Technically, travelling with same people for a while and some people enter. I heart debate.

The photo above is taken at the Society Lounge. Maybe a great party, but if only you know, this was followed by some strings of heartache. But nevertheless, everything seemed to be fine now. I just learned to trust again.

So that's my team for this debate tournament. Apparently not my dream team, of course I have to be more specific. But it went through the rounds. No much gap in the speaker scores and everything was done to constructively assess the motions. Maybe, I just don't like the Asians that much because I get noticed more in the BP season. So it's a matter of a contrasting preview.

Just as how the match-ups is being explicit, it's an IV so you could expect the weirdest compo's and even international teams to flood the tournament. That itself placed an essential spice for the debate run and how it differs from other union-sanctioned tournaments locally.

And LSIV experience will never be complete without strolling to places. We went to different shopping malls, coffee shops and a bar. That's what defines Manila lights.

And because Calvin and I are quite bored with the flight delay, we took a pic not just for aesthetic reasons. But more of setting the tone for our team-up in the upcoming MPDC.I hope I could get by and won't rust after my trip.
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