life disclosed with imaginations

In this world of ours, we couldn't just stop asking ourselves what more can we do with this life. It's full of displaced attention, elsewhere rejections, anonymous disguises tring to be a hero but an enemy in the dark. Maybe, if jealousy and insecurity is not present in this world, there wouldn't be any chaos at all.Or maybe if it was a thing that was never triggered by someone, the want to be another person as you were isn't there to begin with.

Just this morning, I went to the Church. It has been 5 months since I last went there and I just found myself walking towards its direction. Whatever it may be that lead me in the place, I thank him. Because I feel satisfied, answered, heard and listened. I confess, I am not a church guy. I rarely go to Church, but why is there a feeling of indifference when you talk to God. Maybe because when I go to his haven, I come to stop. Realize things that I couldn't realize when I am in any other place because I'm predisposed of believing that I have so many other things to do yet. I left the place happily and forgot all the problems in this world for a moment.

Then I've seen my friends calling me in the other side of the road. I intently came back so that I could come on their place but they crossed the road as well, so that by the time I am in their place,they were in the other side already. But i never got irritated at all. They waited for me and asked me if I would come with them. But I hesitated because I'm going to take my lunch yet.I arrived in the dormitory and tried to compile different photocopies, thinking that even if hate photocopies in reality, I would have to love it because the books are far expensive. I remember last week I was quite complaining that if only I have books, I would have been any better study whore material. But things has to be accepted. In this world of ours, we are predestined instruments. We come to live by with what has been given to us. I think there's nothing so wrong accepting what we are. What's so wrong is when we try to pretend as someone we aren't. I cannot do that and I hope people would realize that as well.

Just a minute ago, I made a time management plan and I'm happy about it. Tomorrow I'm gonna do something like it because it's going to invigorate me to be somehow energetic as things were a lot planned than the recent days.Yesterday, I just love the way people are talking to me seriously. Like how I view things. LT told me yesterday I should give some kind of credit for myself. I shouldn't view myself as someone who is small fish swimming in a pond of shame. Maybe it's true. The way people think about what we are is also reflective of who we truly are. I am pessimist. I always look humiliating myself always, but nevertheless, I've changed now.

Well,I've written so much already. I just thought of adding something to my blog since it's been a month since my last entry. I was quite busy these recent days but hopefully, I will be able to write regularly. It's my best way of relaxation, I tell you.

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